Grandma's kind and Grandma's sweet
And Grandma's also a racist
Grandma bakes you tasty treats
And Grandma's also a racist
Grandma will always be there for you
When you're feeling sad and blue
But Grandma also hates blacks and Jews
'Cuz she's a fucking racist
Grandma's on your Facebook feed
And Grandma's also a racist
Grandma's reposting Minions memes
And Grandma's also a racist
Grandma wants to make it clear
That Sharia Law isn't welcome here
It's an absolutely unfounded fear
And she's a fucking racist
Grandma goes to church on Sunday
And Grandma's also a racist
Grandma's going to heaven one day
But she's stil totally racist
Doesn't it seem slightly odd
That Grandma's so pious and yet so flawed?
Praying away to her racist God
They're both fucking racist
Grandma grew up in a different time
And that's why Grandma's a racist
What's offensive now used to seem just fine
But that doesn't make it not racist
Considering all the bullshit that she's been taught
Grandma's a model of progressive thought
But while some things are relative, racism's not
And she's a fucking racist
Stop calling them "darkies," Grandma
That's not okay
And while we're at it, please stop
Complaing about "the gays"
This isn't a complex issue, there's no shades of grey
Just don't be shitty to someone based on something
That doesn't affect you at all...
Grandma's a person, and people aren't perfect
Sometimes people are racist
It's easy to act like a person is worthless
But we're all a little bit racist
Grandma's lived an amazing life
And faced all sorts of impossible strife
She was a caring mother and a devote wife
And any assault on her character is totally baseless...
...except pointing out how she's a fucking racist
credits
from The Grandma EP,
released May 20, 2016
Recorded, mixed and mastered by Mitch Holtby.