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I Wanna Eat Everything

from Laughcore by Success 5000

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lyrics

I wanna make myself a sandwich
Pile it high with plenty of canned fish
'Til it stands taller than a hand's width
I'm eatin' up your bandwidth
Lookin' for a recipe for flan
Which I'll have for dessert
I'll eat the sandwich first
And maybe like a pasta salad
Off to the side
And a bowl of soup to cleanse my palate
And something fried
Like an onion ring, or a chicken wing, or a veggie springroll
I might just try to fry a living thing whole
I'm so hungry I could eat a horse or a car
Or a helicopter on its way to Isla Nublar
And once I got there I could eat a clone of a dinosaur
I could eat a raptor or Sam Jackson's severed arm
Life, uh, finds a way to be delicious
And amphibian genetic code is notably nutritious
I am the perfect predator, I'm cunning and I'm vicious
I'll eat everything in sight and when I'm done I'll eat the dishes

I WANNA EAT EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING, ALL THE TIME
I ate an all­-you­-can­-eat buffet out of business in seven days
I ate so many Eggs­ Bennies my blood turned into Hollandaise
I WANNA EAT EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING

I get hungry in the middle of snacks
I get panic attacks, if I run out of Jello pudding packs
I order pizza to eat while I wait
For the takeout I ordered from the Vietnamese buffet
My appetite is like dynamite, detonating with such insatiable cravings
I can't stop myself from salivating
Concentrating constantly to keep my control
'Cause if I didn't I already would've swallowed you whole
I'll never be full, I've come to accept this
I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner for breakfast
Lupper and brunch, even supfast and snunch,
I'll eat 'em all and still be ready to munch
I was designed to dine, constructed to consume
I could eat the whole world and still have room
I got a scientist to swap out all my organs and guts
I got seventeen stomachs and eighteen butts

I WANNA EAT EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING, ALL THE TIME
I once ate a phonebook without even trying
I eat, sleep and breathe food ­ doctors say I'm dying
I WANNA EAT EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING, ALL THE TIME
My esophagus leads to another dimension
My internal anatomy defies comprehension
I WANNA EAT EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING, ALL THE TIME
I'm digging up info to blow off the lid
On the secret fifth food group that the government hid
I WANNA EAT EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING, ALL THE TIME
And if the secret service hears what I said
And I wind up dead...

Bury me inside the food pyramid

credits

from Laughcore, released March 21, 2015

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Success 5000 Edmonton, Alberta

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